Headaches.

First of all, I must apologize. I have paired Chiaki and the real Lulu together. It's just that I changed her personality and added another bunch of characters from another anime in it. Yay for crossovers.
 So while I am still looking through my old writings(since I haven't really dealt with them for a while now, which is weird, because well...I like to be stuck in my past), I am growing more and more irritated because I simply can't find one of them. Yes, I admit that my naming sense for documents is beyond comprehension, but hey, as long as I kept checking them all the time, I could actually remember what was where. And ignore the two word documents(I should get rid of those as well...) which I know I am never going to finish(though they have Mokona in them...).
 I'm currently very frustrated at myself because of a pole vault competition. Although I must admit that the wind was partly at fault, the result I got was by no means acceptable. The fact that I got first place with it and they engraved the bloody result on the medal makes things only worse. And now since it is finally 'vacation time', I have the option to go to practice once a week. People really like to encourage my boredom, don't they?
 I have no idea how much time has passed since then, but at one point I ranted on a lot of anime here. And I made this one prediction on an anime called Rinne no Lagrange. Well, turns out I got it wrong. I think Rinne no Lagrange is...yuri. As far as I've understood. Didn't think I could miss with that much, but hey, they've hidden the girls love quite well there(which technically makes it shoujo ai, not yuri). Oh well, as long as they start explaining the secret plot they have there, I'm in.
 A lot of stuff has happened lately and again I find myself thinking all sort weird things. But they die out with every passing day so I amuse myself with weird silly fantasies which are pleasant to think about, although not very practical nor rational. But looking back on the stuff I have written in my life time, there never has been an ounce of rationality in me. Merlin, I wonder whether the unhappiness I have generated of myself might have been caused by these writings. I mean, it almost seems natural that they always cry and cry and cry...
 Questions have been on my mind, questions I want to know the answers to, yet I find myself  feeling reluctant about asking them. They serve no point, except to hurt myself a little bit more perhaps and I'm not sure whether I am willing to do that to myself considering that the last few days have been a lot of fun and have had several nice things happening. Besides, I probably will never get a chance to ask those questions anyways.
  Another story idea has been lurking on my mind and there's still an unfinished one waiting as a draft but whether I find the motivation to continue them will be clear after I found one of my old ones.

Wish me luck,
H.