Vanity and insanity

Turns out I am too lazy to keep proof of my existence in my right pocket.
Though, if being honest, that little notebook was only the tip of the ice berg.
No matter how much I write, it will still be only a fraction of what I think/feel.
It is amazing how much you can think through with very little time.
15 minutes in the bus and my head is full of questions.
How can it be that I need four meters for two steps?
Is feeling uncomfortable a must when the word fancy is involved?
At least the weekend will be peaceful...depending on how bored people are.
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The taste of painkillers?!?!?!
Hoping for something is extremely ridiculous.
You'll be disappointed when it happens.
You'll still be disappointed half an hour later.
You start being reasonable and telling yourself it is your own fault for hoping in the first place.
But you'll still feel bad about it.
Then you decide that hoping is stupid and you should not do it again.
Fat chance of that happening though.
In the end, you get distracted by other stuff, sleep on it a little and realise that nothing was wrong in the first place.
I should cool my head before making decisions.
I shouldn't reflect on stuff that much.
But I should reflect more on my own behaviour.
German class is an exception though. Even if the teacher gives me the strangest looks.
It's not my fault they had a part for the dog as well.
It might be my fault that I decided that I had to die in the middle of the discussion though.
It doesn't matter where I am, there's always a person who is able to solve the rubik's cube.
People really like to disturb my thinking progress.
Do I even want people to know what I am thinking?
Or do I want to know what is going on in their heads?
What kind of person am I in their opinion?
And I'm not talking about strangers.
Nobody cares about strangers.
I like to make things more dramatic for no reason.
I love especially overdramatic behaviour.
I'm not sure how often it is portrayed as part of my character though.
Then again, I have no clue about what exactly my character is like in general.
I never thought I could find a German song with an accent funny.
Eurovision has proven me wrong.

There's a fine line between love and hate,
H.